History of Cranbrook Quilters Guild Exhibit Launched
September 18th, 2024
Floating Airships
By MBSS Student Intern Sasha Buckley
I’m going to be honest; this is a bomb. Zeplin, airship, blimp, gas can, air can, can, helium can, zeplin can, call it whatever you want, it’s a bomb.
These used to be all around the continent. These used to be the big craze, the new technological advancement, and the latest milestone in development.
Why do you think they stopped? They blew up.
They are big, hollow air sausages that blow up when you fail to adjust the nono square’s pressure correctly. Also, because people like money, it costs as much as it costs to make the thing just to run it for a day.
They also realized that a much more efficient and versatile way to do air transport is to put wings on a tin can with a wood stove and a pedal motor.
And it’s not like they’re GOOD bombs, either. They’re rather obvious when flying into enemy territory because they’re not blue. And even if they were, they’re so slow and fragile they could be shot out of the sky by some kid with a golf club at the bottom of his dugout looking for the ball.
They’re like bomb shells but made of thin fabric and move forward by a blow horn. As you can tell by the image, there is an explosion in the background; these things are meant to explode.
Next time you see a floating air sausage that’s not pulling a banner of a coffee ad, say goodbye to your pets and leave your country.
